This Weekend in Quotes

Even though it’s Saturday night and there’s a whole other day and rest of the night ahead of me — why yes, I’m putting up a blog post at 10pm on a Saturday night, because I’m the most popular — I’ve encountered a few life-affirming quotes so far this weekend. Here’s a few examples:

“I really hope they put off the Rapture until after the Preakness. I kind of want to see it.” – my dad

“I wish I was Facebook friends with him so I could de-friend him.” – Meg

Preface: My mom bought that “fantabulis” red couch (see this post as a reference) she’s been dying for. Except with Gracer (see this post as a reference) she doesn’t want to get it ruined, so she put a plain white cover over it. She sits down on it, crosses her legs, throws her head back, and sinks into it with both arms sprawled and cusping the top of the cushions. “Oooh, I just love sitting on my new couch. Too bad I can’t see it.”

My mom hadn’t heard about all the Rapture hoopla. When my sister and I told her about it. “No, He’ll come like a thief in the night. No one will know the time nor day.”

Poll time. Who do you think my mom was referring to when she used the vague patriarchal heavy, gender-biased “He”?

A. Yahweh
B. The Flying Spaghetti Monster
C. Scott Peterson
D. Jeebus
E. Mithra
F. Sharktopus

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